Go Ossifer Mussell.

I hate being the jerk coughing and smoking. But I am.

I’m zonked on DayQuil and just spaced at Chinatown and missed my transfer. My bad.

Had a temp of 99.5. Ate ice cream. Waited 15 minutes. Temp 98.8.

I can has pig flu.

Got a nine year old? Why not just have them babysit the two year old? I love public transit.

Still can’t sleep. Need Ambien, dark room and 12 - 24 hours.

Can’t sleep. How is that possible?

Sampson is a super cool guy.
At about 12 or so, he was recently brought to Wagtime from DC Animal Control. Intact, filthy, a little deaf, a little slow.
For the past three nights, he’s hung out with me overnight in the small dog room upstairs at Wag and for three nights I’ve been charmed by this unfortunate geezer.

This guy loves people.
He sits at my feet and looks up at me with his gentle, old eyes and smiles.
Seriously.
Smiles.
Turns up the corners of his mouth and lays his ears soft: A truly submissive gesture from, yup, a giant intact male rescue dog.
This guy has clearly had a lot of people-greetin’ experience.

Some dogs just, clearly, want to bond with a person. Sampson is one of those dogs.
I don’t know what his story is, but I do know that it’s pretty apparent that he is happiest when getting the time of day from the closest person.

He humps.
Which is hilarious in a 12-year-old, happy, dopey Lab.
Everyone says, “he doesn’t know how big he is,” or “he doesn’t know how old he is,” but, seriously, I don’t think Big Sam has any idea that he’s, technically, geriatric.
He picks the feistiest young dog and rough houses until he gets tired and sacks out flat at your feet.
He attempts to hump his playmate, but since he usually picks a quick little female to play with, he’s not typically successful.
Which is also funny.
When the feisty female turns about to hump him in return, he is gentle and continues to play without aggressive escalation you might expect from an old, intact male dog.

Today when I got here, I took him for his final walk of the evening. It’s funny that I just assume he lived outside, but he seems happiest to not eliminate indoors.

He marks any and everything on a walk, but will need to be monitored closely in a new home to prevent marking.

He drinks loads of water; Not uncommon at all for old dogs, but something worth mentioning to the vet. Subsequently, he pees a lot. I think it would be disappointing to see Sam trying to live out his golden years on the 10th floor of a condo building downtown, probably causing him to fail at housebreaking.

I’m amazed by how sturdy Sampson is, for how minimal it appears his vet care has been and how old & big he is.
I had to stare hard at his gait to decide that I think he has a slight hobble in his left hind hip. Even then, I can say pretty confidently that his slightly impaired gait appears less off than that of younger dogs I’ve met who’ve maintained perfectly, longterm, on relatively non-aggressive and inexpensive anti-inflammatory drug treatment.
He’s a Lab: I am more impressed than dismayed with his orthopedic stability. In fact, his overall health is pretty encouraging.
He has a funny little lump on his head that appears non-painful and doesn’t look like it is prone to rupture, but, again, that’s something to ask a vet.
He seems to have hearing loss, but distractibility, of course, it worsened by the presence of balls.

I’m no behavior genius, but I bet he would be extremely happy on the first floor of a row house with a tiny yard. He likes other dogs, but seems more people-centered. He would probably be perfectly satisfied as the only dog in a less-than-athletic household.

On his walk this evening, he trotted (yeah, seriously) along as I took giant steps down 9th Street, around the corner to N, through Blagden Alley and around the Convention Center and back to Wag. He walks like a gentleman, and with soft cues through the leash, he sits when asked at intersections and doesn’t tug to the end of the leash.
I figured I was smoking a cigarette and he’s 12 and maybe slightly arthritic; We were about evenly matched.

Moral of the story: What a cool, old dog. He has a few good years left and would maybe even be a good first dog for someone who did a little research on old dogs and behavior.

If you are interested in learning more about my homeboy, Sampson, or, hey, maybe you just want to donate a couple of bucks to his care so someone else can give him another try at being a pet, e-mail Lisa & Ofer at Wagtime.

Sitting on the accordian of the accordian bus.